Just take a few minutes to read through our table manners section and you'll be the most sophisticated diner at the table. Visit our international dining etiquette section for more etiquette tips for your next trip overseas or hosting international guests! The hostess stands in the living room, near the door. As guests enter, the hostess greets and welcomes them. The host, who is circulating and talking to other guests, excuses himself and comes to greet each arrival.
Pre-dinner drinks are then served. After the cocktail hour, all guests are invited to proceed to the dining room. The hostess is always the last to go into the dining room when place cards are used. If there are no place cards, the hostess indicates where guests are to sit. There are two key considerations in deciding where guests are to be seated. At a very formal dinner served by a staff, one server generally stands behind the hostess's chair, except when pouring wine.
At a smaller dinner one server will handle everything himself; or, if he has a server to help him, he passes the principal dishes and the server follows with the accompanying dishes. No serving dishes or platters are ever put on the table except ornamental compotes of fruit or candy.
From the time the table is set until it is cleared for dessert, a service plate should remain at every place. The dessert plates are put down on the tablecloth. The plates of every other course have to be exchanged, and therefore each individual service requires two hands at a time. Seven courses are the maximum for even the most elaborate formal dinner.
They include:. One is to put the dessert fork and spoon on the dessert plate. Another formal way to serve dessert is to bring the finger bowl, as well as the fork and spoon, on a small doily on the dessert plate. The diner puts the finger bowl, with the doily, to the left above his plate and places the fork and spoon each to its proper side.
After dessert, the diner dips his fingers, one hand at a time, into the water and then dries his fingers on his napkin. Come with a few talking points in mind. Be curious about others and ask engaging questions of others. Participate in conversation that you feel comfortable joining and introduce yourself where appropriate. If you know a few people at the dinner party , they can help you with introductions to other guests.
You should also do the same for other guests. But what should you do if you make a social blunder while at the dinner party? It can certainly happen to the best of us.
First and foremost, you do not want to get overly defensive or turn it into a yelling match. The longer you wait to apologize, the worse the faux pas becomes.
And accidents do happen. Many a data plan has been exhausted with minute-to-minute updates about getting on fictitious trains or phantom pileups on the F. Be brief and honest and leave the protracted sagas to Tolstoy. Host: Be ready when you said the evening would begin. Guest: As many etiquette conventions have fallen away, this one is timeless: do not bring someone unless you have cleared it with the host first. Even if it is not a seated dinner, it is not a barn raising.
More than likely it will be fine, but who are you to decide? Make an uninvited guest feel just as comfortable. Hold out your hand. What do you do now? This is a crucial moment. Give a good firm handshake.
Look them in the eyes, give them a big smile, and compliment the host on something specific you enjoyed about the evening. Gather your things. This only opens up the chance of getting sucked back into social purgatory. And it bursts the warm memory the host and remaining guests started forming about you as soon as you left. Make sure you have your cell phones. If you do happen to leave something, wait until tomorrow to come pick it up.
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